On a jet plane

My kids are in New York.
Hashtag #Sob-Fest2016 #Whambulance #SoBored

They go twice a year to visit family. I'm used to it. They have a blast. I'm happy for them.
 
What to do.
 
Isn't that the questions we all face. What do we do with our time? What is the ideal goal of accomplishment in our lives?
What happens next after you've experience some of the more common life goal things people strive for.
  • Marriage- check
  • Having babies- check
  • Get a career you Love- check
  • Have Abs of Steel- well......okay, so not everything is ideal.
But what else.

I still feel this immense urge that I am not living up to my full potential. WHY is that!? I want to make a difference. But how. What is my passion????? Who needs something!???

I literally watch motivational YouTube videos while I get ready in the mornings.

Tony Robbins 4 life.

This eventually leads me to spend the first 4 hours of my day in full "Arnold Mode,"  Eyeballing that stack of papers on my desk. Whispering in my best Arnold voice, "You look like a little puny pile, who do you think you are with your little puny words and deadlines"
My work never even sees it coming.

But the strange cycle I live is, eventually by 5:00 p.m., there's nothing more I want to do, than to do the exact opposite of "Pumping Up" my motivation. In fact. Cooking dinner seems like a lot of work by 6:00 p.m. Like a serious work out for my brain.
Putting stuff in a pan and setting the temperature is hard work man. You have to actually make decisions on what to mash together with the ingredients you have.... that late in the day. But I just spent 8 hours deciding things? No way.  I have a list of  dinners I rotate during the week because of this. Got chicken. Yup. Chicken tonight kids. Leftover Broccoli? Looking like stir-fry tonight kids.
Not even an ounce of creativity that  so heavily engulfed me  at 7:46 a.m. that morning.

I literally thought of starting my own organization to help others at 7:46 a.m. this morning.

Maybe I'm just a morning person.

That's all for today.

Gotta make dinner...... :/



 

2 comments:

  1. I know the feeling. I usually just pick up a rag and start cleaning to stop my mind from wondering what to do, because for sure you will be wondering for hours. Then at least you can look back at what you accomplished. No fun but with the right music and dancing around it brings you joy. I also read and do, mindful breathing. You breath in and then when you breathe out you do it with a smile. I love it.

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