Bye Bye Birdie

Its so surreal.
These moments in your life that you anticipate. Wait for.

It's crazy how you look forward to something for so long, then one day, it happens.
All of a sudden, you are living in the moment.
You want to laugh. But your brain gets foggy. This dream/vision becomes a reality.
I think its hard for the brain to accept.

Like childbirth.
I remember being in labor with Sarah. I was in so much pain and hazy.
All of the those expectations are either being met, or things are going unexpected.
I realized that at THAT MOMENT,  I, Amber Gaither, now wife, was HAVING A BABY, a moment I had processed for 9 and a half months was NOW, ACTUALLY happening.
Oddly, after having my mind focused on only pain tolerance, was now focusing on the room, my mom, sitting in the corner starring at me helpless and Ali fiddling with his shirt, nervously waiting for whatever was going to happen next.
I smirked.
I really wanted to laugh.  In fact, in my mind I was laughing. How odd, I thought to myself, suddenly laughing out of the blue.
That awkward laugh you get when your being yelled at by a person who has a huge booger in their nose, you have to be serious and listen, but all you really want, is to bust out laughing.
But you stay composed.
I stayed composed(well sorta), and she was born.

I really should have just laughed.

I waited 4 1/2 years for Sarah's  first day of Kindergarten. Scratch that, I knew Kindergarten was coming and I was preparing for it.
Throughout the years of seeing pictures of 'first day outfits,' shiny new sneakers and Dora the Explorer lunchboxes, what a proud moment that must be.
It is.
I am proud. Proud I have made it this far alive. Proud that I have become the mother I am, and most of all proud of who she is.

We love you.