If you like Pina Coolada~

Is that how you spell that, pina coolada?!

IF YOU LIKE peeeeenyya cooooolaaada!

Love that song!

Maybe its a sign from the heavens I need one- HAHA!

Jay Kay.



My ex husband is dating a great girl.........


I mean......

SUPER great.

Like.... ten years younger, knitted him a scarf by hand, makes my son a cake from scratch, does his laundry and even FOLDS it great.

Did I also mention she drives a Prius, is a nurse, owns a home and is a NATURAL blonde. Natural.
YOU KNOW she only shaves her legs like, once a month. I have to tame my leg hair beast at least once a day. Because I am NOT a natural blonde......

I also do NOT own a Prius.

I'm happy for him. He deserves it. He really does. My heart is happy.

Ugh.

Relationships? Phfft. Seems to be an on going joke for ME lately.

I get the......."Lets move in together?"  oh wait, no. Let me go on trips with my ex first and then then we can talk......after.......when I'm done.......going on trips with my ex girlfriend............................................................................................

Writing this and seeing it, makes me worried for my mental health.

Who doesn't like to have someone we can watch sappy movies with, explore on weekends, hike and flirt with?!

Its time for some serious changes in Amber's dating department......

In other news!
My son turned 7 yesterday! He is getting so biggles! Check out his face.

On an even more serious and terrifying topic.

My daughter wears bras now.

daily.

All day.... errday.

Not because she needs them. But because she WANTS to.

*Deep breath*

The other night she was really upset because of the type of veggie burger I was grilling up for her.
I mean.
SO upset.
So much so, that she dramatically threw herself on her bed and cried and felt pity on herself for having a household that does not provide burgers made from "cows."
(In no way shape or form am I promoting veganism to my kids, I just don't buy meat anymore)

These were some GOOD burgers too man!

I could tell by her......not so typical reaction, that is was WAY beyond her eating a vegan burger.
My pre-pubescent girly hormone alert went off......"Danger! Danger! Abort! ABORT CONVERSATION!! THIS WILL END BADLY, DO NOT SAY ANYTHING!!!! RUN AWAY!??, THIS IS BEYOND YOUR CONTROL, SHE'S WEARING BRAS!!! THIS IS HER HORMONES SPEAKING-THIS IS NOT YOUR DAUGHTER, SHE IS HER EMOTIONS RIGHT NOW, DO NOT ARGUE, THIS IS NOT YOUR DAUGHTER, CALL SOMEONE FOR HELP, PUT DOWN THE SPATULA-GET A PAN, BOIL SOME WATER- MAKE HER SOME NOODLES NOW!!! GET TO DA CHOPPA!!!!!!"

All I could do was hug her.
Just hold her.
Let her sob in my chest and whine about this terrible thing that was happening to her.

Stupid veggies, they ruin everything.

That's it.........

Then she was fine...........................

Let's just say I quietly scooted over a plate of pasta to her after she settled down. Then I watched her smile and talk about her day....

Like NOTHING HAPPENED!!!!!



Gulp.

I need that... 'What to expect when your expecting an upcoming teenager' handbook. Anyone know where I can get a copy?!??? 

Until next time.

Amba