Carwash

I am torn.
We need money.

Life was easier when I worked, but for some reason, I had problems leaving Sarah.

I enjoyed my job, I just didn't let myself.

So, if I do decide to work, I want to make sure I can find a good babysitter. That's my problem.
I think my demands for a babysitter are kinda high.

Ugh.

Well, being poor has humbled our family. Not that we were ever rich.
Having no food has made us appreciate it so much more, and use up all of what we have instead of buying more.
We have gotten creative.
We also HAVE food, so we are grateful for that, because some people don't have anything.

But, life was easier when I worked.

What to do?

My daughter has learned to sign "I love you," and she has been sweet Sarah lately.
When we are driving she says "mommyyyyyy, loooook," I look in the rearview and she is signing "I love you." It's very sweet. I am very proud of her. She surprises me everyday.
When I tucked her in last night I told her I loved her and was proud of her, she said, "I'm not being a naughty girl, I'm being a good girl," popped her thumb in her mouth and nodded yes, confirming it to herself.
It was funny.
She was happy about that.
ME TOO!
Let's hope she continues to WANT to be a good girl instead of naughty, into her teens.

"Mom, I decided not to drink that fourth beer and drive home, I called a cab instead!"

Ali says we are in trouble.

One of our recent visuals into the future was after bath. She was shaking her exposed fanny back and forth, singing, "sarah, sarah, who do you see? I see Caleb looking at me."

NO SARAH!
BAD SARAH!
Ali had to come break it to me.
I'm glad I didn't witness this.

This is why I am teaching her early that "boys smell and like brown and black, and girls are pretty and we like pink and purple and sparkles!"

She then asked me to have a sleepover party with Zeus and tells Ali that he smells.

Not what I had intended.

Our nighttime routine has been the same since Sarah was born.
Bath-time, brush teeth, put her hair in a bun, P.J's, she comes to give me a series of kisses (pucker kiss, fish kiss, 'lots of kisses', little kiss and then just a regular), then story time with Daddy (she has progressed from 3 books to 5), then sleep.
It goes in this order too.
I tried to braid her hair once when Ali was working late, and that the wrooooong move.
She cried for like an hour, "I want a bunnnnn, not a braiiiidddd, daddy always puts my hair in a bun, not a brrrraaaaiiiidddddd, I don't want a braaaiiiiddddddd"
Let's just say, I won't do that again.

I think night time is my favorite time because it's scheduled. We know what to expect and things run smoothly (besides the braid incident). They are usually both happy and conforming.

Maybe I need to schedule out the day more, so we aren't disheveled and know what to expect???

Snacktime
Movietime
Playtime
Dinner
craft-time?

I don't know, it just seems so, SCHEDULED!

Where is that parent handbook?

Schedule? Work? Ugh.